I Don’t Understand English

The English language remains strange to me. Aside from my difficulty in understanding correct grammar, and me using “he” when I mean “she” and vice versa (apparently it’s a Filipino thing?), there are other things in this language that I just don’t have a clue. Here are some case in point:

awe: feeling of reverential respect mixed with fear or wonder

some: at least a small amount or number

full: not lacking; complete

I know that full is much more than some; but why is awesome so much better than awful?

park: bring a vehicle to a halt and leave it temporarily

drive: operate and control the direction and speed of a motor vehicle

way: a road, track, path, or street for traveling along

Then why the heck we park in the driveway and drive in the parkway?

pretty: attractive

ugly: unpleasant or repulsive

little: small in size, amount, or degree

big: considerable size, extent, or intensity

So what does pretty ugly (eg. She’s pretty ugly.) or little big (eg. This shoe is a little big.) means?

But I have a feeling I’m not alone.

If English made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur” — Doug Larson.

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